This one is hard for me…
I am a father of a beautiful daughter and I look at her and see so much potential for greatness. I see a queen… I see a model… I see a Lady…
My daughter is my little lady in training and all I want for her is the best in life. I want her to be the greatest woman on the planet. Beautiful inside and out. I want her to be powerful and phenomenal and dynamic. Bold and fearless. Still, all that I see in her can go unfullfilled without the simple things in life that only a father can give a woman.
Men, never underestimate the effects of time well spent with your daughters. With that said, really think about the effects that your ABSENCE does to your female children.
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The father is the first (AND ONLY) male that will love a woman *WITH NO CONDITIONS*. She ain’t gotta “act right”. She ain’t gotta be pretty or sexy or provocative or submissive. She’s his daughter. A father’s love comes with no conditions that a woman must work for. Therefore, the validation that a girl gets from her father is second to none. Every other man she will encounter will require something from her for his validation. I don’t need to name such requirements but a quick scroll through your social media newsfeeds will show the depths some women will go to for male validation. I swear, women selling their souls these days for LIKES/COMMENTS/SHARES/FOLLOWS.
I’ve seen women SELL THEIR SOULS just to buy some ATTENTION… #HavMireThoughts
— Willie Words HavMire (@WillieHavMire) January 5, 2015
I heard Chris Rock say one time: A father’s only job is to keep his daughter off the pole!
I used to think “c’mon Chris… it’s more than that…” but the more I thought about it, yeah… that about sums it up.
When women grow up without a father, they go “looking for love in all the wrong places”. Women gonna get their validation. Too often in society, fathers are devalued much to the detriment of the youth but it’s becoming glaringly apparent that the absence of an active father can be seen in the mentalities of our women. Our daughters. Our mothers. The state of ratchetness amongst our women today is at an all time high. Andre 3000 in his song “Behold, a Lady” once said: One day we will have to take our kids to a museum to see what a lady is… I used to think he was exaggerating a bit but the more I thought about it, yeah…. that about sums it up.
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Face it, women who have active fathers who they seek to make proud often conduct themselves better. No slight to my women raised by single mothers doing the best they could but some things you miss out on that you may frankly never realize.
I recently asked my lady’s father for her hand in marriage before I proposed and I told some women about it. They were shocked. “Why you have to ask him???” “Who does that these days???” “My man ain’t gotta ask my sorry father sh*t!” I was like damn, lol.
I told them that it made my lady’s day that I got her father’s approval and blessing before asking for her hand. She loves her father. She in turn loved that he approved of our union. That’s the value of a father. I thank him for his part in producing a woman that I have never had an argument with. One that isn’t spiteful or vindictive or starved out for attention. She’s a genuinely good woman. That’s what I hope to have in my own daughter.
*looking at my word count*
Okay, I just reached my legal limit for words (self imposed) and will close by saying with my own daughter I tell her I love her and that she’s my favorite person on the planet as much as possible. I give her all the attention and praise I can muster and I actively seek to date her whenever I can. She is turning ten this March and I want to step it up even more and be a positive, non-judgemental man in her life that she can always count on and come to for anything. I don’t want her to ever need validation from “the world” and will raise her to be confident and self assured in her conduct. I’m trying to raise a lady. The key is giving her all the validation she needs.
(and keeping her off the pole(^;)